I lack confidence. It's something I've struggled with my whole life, and will continue to struggle with on a daily basis. When someone pays me a compliment I usually take it with a (large) grain of salt, and make excuses for why it doesn't count. For example I recently changed my facebook profile photo, and a few of my friends made some really sweet compliments telling me I look great. My initial reaction was, ' awe that's so sweet, but they probably mean I have a cute outfit on, cause I just look like me.'. My lack of confidence doesn't end there either. I have a hard time believing I'm talented or smart. Usually when someone says they're impressed by something I've made I chalk it up to a lack of experience on their part. Not that I'm all that good, just that they don't have much to compare it to. This is a terrible habit to be in. It's a part of me I'd truly like to change.
I know it's something that will take a lot of work, and wont change overnight, but having more confidence is something I think a lot of people (especially women) could benefit from. As a school photographer there isn't a day that goes by that a women doesn't say to me "I hate my picture being taken". Or once I snap the photo, and show it to them, "that's me, and it wont get any better". Even the beautiful women say, "ugh, I look horrible" on a regular basis. Belittling ourselves knows no bounds. Most of the time I blame the media. How can average everyday women not see flaws glaring back at them from the mirror, when they are surrounded by images of women 'aging gracefully' with plenty of plastic surgery and botox? We can't all be super models, and we shouldn't all want to be! There is nothing wrong with wrinkles, gray hair, and even a little flab wont kill you. Nor will my pimples.
I want to take a stand for women of all shapes and sizes, and degrees of intelligence. We are all beautiful and talented in our own unique way. It doesn't matter if you are a size zero or fourteen. If you like to read Nietzsche, or if you would rather work on your tan. Or if you like to do both! We are all unique snowflakes (hey Fight Club fans), and we don't have to neatly fit into a predetermined box defined by someone other than yourself. It's time to find something that makes you feel good about you. For me that's yoga. I might not be the best, but whenever I do yoga I feel a bit stronger and more centered, and thus more confident.
Confident that next time I'll be able to hold that pose for longer.
Confident that I'll be able to stretch deeper into my position.
Confident that I'm a strong and powerful woman, and I can accomplish anything I set my mind to.
I know yoga wont have the same affect on everyone, but I urge you to open your mind and soul to search for that something that will. It's important to fill our lives with positivity, and only good can come out of doing things that make you feel good about yourself. Good luck searching, and if you've already found it, I'd love to hear about your positive activities! What things do you do to feel better about yourself?
Happy DIYing, chris!
